Just blogging about bumbling around the web and bumbling through life..
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Latest Posts
See Ya Later Bye Bye
Tomorrow we leave on our cruise to the Bahamas and Virgin Islands. I may or may not have internet , last year the ship was unable to support Vista. My sister is has her laptop so I should be able to jump onto there. So looking forward to this trip and we are arriving in style, a stretch Cadillac Escalade Limo. It seats 20, we only have 11 and a shit load of luggage. I'm exhausted from all the family coming in last night and today. Must get sleep.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Banish Boredom In the Bathroom
I can get rid of the stacks of Honey's sports papers and my magazines? Replace them with one book? Too good to be true.
Being at home day after day fucks with your head. I ventured out yesterday and am paying the price for it today, I guess that's what happens when they pull all your insides out through your va-jay-jay and stick crap in your in belly button to slice and dice. The good news, no big ugly scars. If this doesn't work out like we planned, I am going to be so pissed at having a hysterectomy at 34.
My big Sister ordered a talking stuffed animal over the internet where she got to record in her own voice her message. I love that thing, it's so soft , just the right size and you can squeeze it hard and smile when it still is chipper.
Cereal Swap
I switched to Captin Crunch with berries, wonder what color it putrifies into. It's got to be better than the Fruit Loops.
Observations
1) If you eat nothing but fruit loops and bagels for a week (maybe more) your poo WILL turn NEON green.
2) If you throw up during this time, you will spew this neon Nickelodeon goo as well.
3) If everybody in the house gets insomnia it will feed off the other's energy. NOBODY WILL SLEEP.
4) It's been 3 weeks since my surgery, I'm not cleared for driving, sex, baths, vacumming. Recovery time is 4-6 weeks. I'm still bleeding somewhat and I'm still in pain. Next appt is the 19th. I'm hoping to get an ok to swim since we will be on a cruise in two weeks.
5) Going with Honey to the Pharmacy is a big deal, they have other crap you can buy while waiting. Going to the grocery store is not fun with Honey, he keeps checking to make sure I don't walk into a display of creamed corn or knock over the watermelons. I may be a tad stoned but I walk slowly and carefully, just like on cops.
6) I think my Big Sister has turned into a Secret Service Agent. Seriously. I'm going to have Honey kidnap her on the cruise and we can interrogate her in our cabin. That will be fun.
7) My 18 year old neice added me as a friend on facebook. Her boyfriend is hot. I'm not even going to spill what I've learned so far. Which is nothing more than what any 18 year old does.
8) If you build it they WILL come.
9) Why we bother to have a home phone anymore is beyond me. We actually pay the phone company just so telemarketers, political parties and phone charities can call US!
10) I have to go lay down again, I'm going to spew neon green again if I don't.
I'm Not That Girl
To wear her heart upon her sleeve, or am I?
It's starting to look like Christmas
Perfect fot my nephew's shared bathroom.
She's Alive!
After my surgery I've been lurking on your blogs. I even left a comment or two. Typing and reading with one eye covered is pretty hard on a girl after awhile. Hence the silence on my blog. But I'mmmmm Baaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkk!
OKTOBERFEST
Salma Hayek's boobs are real. The right one is larger than the left one. I have the same problem.
Nun Too Late
This may come as a shock but deep inside I have kinda always wished I had become a nun. You know take an oath of silence, live simply and peacefully. The convents I saw in Greece were just so beautiful and calm. I would want to be the candle lighter. And another thing..nuns don't have bad hair days.
Mommy's Little Angel
Yesterday Honey took a nap and Fletch (The Beagle) gained control of the remote, he's really good at that. So out of all the channels that we get on the Dish where does he stop? On the Jewelry Channel. That's my boy! When there is nothing else on TV we watch the jewelry channel until one of us or both of us can't take it anymore. It's like arm wrestling or something.
PS. The stuff we ordered that one time, not so impressed...
TTQ
Even a Temper Tantrum Queen can't take herself too seriously ALL the time.
Trouble
Fo' Real Dog
You know that even with my crazy web skills even I couldn't make this shit up. Sanrio really is going to take over the world and make it pink. What started as a love obsession is quickly turning in to a passionate distaste. Like me screaming "make it stop" Uncle!.
Then again I'm in a pretty dark mood this week. No, even if I were cheerful, I might just throw up in my mouth.
ABC has a test at the below address to see who's campaign statements, McCain's or Obama's, you agree with most. They don't tell you who made the statements, of course, but a statement made by each candidate on the same topic (economy, immigration, judiciary, etc.) will be side by side. You just pick which statement you agree with and, after selecting all 13, you'll find out which candidate's philosophy you support. Try it at:
I'm happy to report that I was voting for the same person who I had originally had my vote reserved for. Did you? You don't have to say WHO just tell me yes or no. Yes if the poll was acurate about who you were voting for or no if it turns out you are more likely to vote someone else.
As if I Needed This
Why is that medicine to make you better makes you sick?? Then I have to take another medicine to combat the side effects of the original medicine. I'm a freaking mess. Who may barf all over her keyboard in oh about 2.2 seconds. Glad I didn't have an eating lunch date today, just coffee. I knew if I ate I wouldn't come home and start taking all this crap. Then Honey would quiz until he was satisified that I had indeed taken it.
God, I'm just a bundle of joy today. Cranky, ill and whiney.
Do Not Rip The Band-Aid Off
I'm back from vacation in my old town Ft. Lauderdale. My brain is so overloaded that I can't process it all yet. seriously. I get gossip via e-mail, but the one on one gossip in person is sooooooo much better. One pleasing moment is that a very very very bad ex was black balled, eighty-sixed, banished, exiled. Why does that make me happy? Because every time I think of the years I threw away on him makes me want to vomit and sends me into a panic attack. There are only two men that can do that to me. It would have been three, but somebody offed the third, for real. And no it wasn't me and he did have it coming.
But basically I came and went unscathed. Ice Princess indeed.
Freakin Crazy
I was in the bathroom brushing my hair when I heard a voice on the TV. I knew that voice, I hadn't heard it in over 10 years but it's hard to forget this lady. It was a woman that worked for me when I was managing a furniture store in the mall. She worked part-time and was always rushing to go see this or that trying to break into the acting biz. I actually went to some of her acting workshops with some other friends too. At one point I was fed up with my two roommates and she and I started looking at places, but I digress. My friend was on Law and Order playing an attorney, and I caught it on TV. Takes me back. Way back. Wish I was 21 and still struted like a peacock, I thought I had the world on a string. But I was wrong.
What Happens When A Newspaper Makes A Mistake?
Since I published late last night, I was clearly not thinking... Upon waking I headed straight for the computer to remove it asap. If you happened to be one of those lucky readers keep it on the down low would ya? TMI, but it kept me busy
So here's a distraction for you Kathy Griffin Topless! I love her piece about celebrities getting the shots of their "Female Parts" by accident...
KEEP HER MOUTH SHUT? NO WAY. IT’S LONELY AT THE TOP
—OF THE DLIST, THAT IS.
Kathy Griffin on Party Girl Crotch Photos
From This Day Forward
Honey is going to join the cyberworld with a new (and a first for him) name. His name: Baldilocks. C'est Bien! His views are strictly his views and have no bearing on mine whatsoever. Granted you are most likely to find him in a Cigar Forum, A Republican Rally and God only knows where when I am out of town. Actually we all know what I am alluding to, it's just in poor taste to say my husband surfs for porn to amuse himself when left alone. I'm sorry Cyd, that you had to read that. Banish it right out of your mind, like poof...never happened.
Not only entering the land of the cyber people with his new name, I accidentally taught him a new word for "female bits" as Meno likes to call them. It's kinda hard not to talk about them with him since he saw the pictures of the laproscopy before I did. He asked me how my "woo" was. I said you mean my vajay-jay? We were in the grocery store and proceeded to launch a whole shopping trip discussing all the different names that people use for genitals. He really likes vajay-jay. I think because it sounds likes something he heard on the streets, he and his friends love to use words like "Big Dog", Woot!, and really anything that makes them sound like they aren't middle aged men. I also reminded him of breasticiles, which could mean that your tits are freezing off or maybe the size of your breasticiles is the female equivalent of how big your balls are.
So sorry world! For the two minor indiscretions that I released on the world by sharing my limited knowledge.
Sunday Tea Anybody?
Anything Goes in Amsterdam
Snoop Dog and Willie Nelson. I thought Willie was still jail or dead or something. I'm going to make a wild guess they are flying high even though they aren't Superman. Which by the way is the name of the song: Superman
